Audrey Hunt from Idyllwild Ca. I’ve been going through some crests and troughs in my life. Don’t feel like you have to make something up to make yourself look better than the next guy. Well, I've got this rash on my left butt cheek... Not bad. Yahoo Answers started out as such a great idea. If you’re the kind of person who’s fed up with the old, so-so, half-hearted replies, then this list is for you! She'll accept your apology if you say "Sorry," though. Could be better [then pause and say] could be worse. I mean something that I will actually laugh at. The best I can be. Who doesn’t like having a funny buddy round who continually has a distinctive response whilst we say “Come ooon, you gotta tell me a shaggy dog story”? ... Don’t miss these funny photos of dogs working from home. I'm guessing Cortana prefers synthetic fabrics. But enough about Google? What do you call a droid that takes the long way around? Living a dream. I'd say I'm a [insert number here] out of 10. Much better (pauses)... still very bad though. HA ha HA ha HA ha HA. Read 100 Flirty Responses to "How Are You?" You didn't know someone would answer your question 11 months after it was asked. 10 Questions That You Probably Don’t Know the Answer To. Read me a haiku. Below are more commands and question you can ask Cortana, please take care, because it is a bit risky, Sometimes Cortana may insult and you won’t even know it.After this section, we’ve also added a massive list of 300 Cortana commands and q’s in alphabetic order. Great, stellar, fantastic, but dead inside. Siri is supposed to do everything a personal assistant would – schedule dates, set reminders, find directions, send messages or make calls via voice commands. Spend just a few minutes with Cortana and it immediately becomes clear that she’s taken the customized awareness of Google Now and the chatty personality of Siri, and then kicked up the schtick several notches. At minding my own business? I am very cute and beautiful , , what about u, “Well, I haven’t died yet, so I guess that’s good”. Tell me something I don't know.? I hug people and smile A LOT. So I can show Santa what I want for Christmas this year. Is everything stable at your end? what to say if someone says (you're ugly ), me: for your information, too bad you can't photoshop your own ugly, Hehe this will make them have to think of what to say XD. Getting better with every passing minute. Ask Cortana whether Bing or Google is better, while you're at it. It would be easy to answer that question with a simple “I’m fine, thank you.” Humans are very complex creatures, but we're also creatures of habit who say one thing when we mean another. Repeat the query a few times for different tunes. I’ve used several of these over the years but it’s hard to keep up as I am often asked and it gets so draining I just end up going back to fine or on ok or one of those standard conditioned responses. Will talk about next step after a huge hug. My psychiatrist told me not to discuss it with strangers. The Bible is the most frequently stolen book in America. 21 Jokes So Stupid They're Actually Funny. Here is a list for you. Can't complain. Ask Cortana why she's blue while you're at it. Ok. Name a bird that people don't usually eat. Siri Answers 60+ Funny Questions Even those who don’t own an iPhone or iPad know about Siri, a smart voice-powered Apple’s assistant. Well, unless the weather has different plans in store. You know, Cortana, I've done that myself once or twice. I can only guess. Trying to get on with life, thanks. HA ha HA ha HA ha HA. Copyright © 2021 IDG Communications, Inc. Next Up: Check out these related slideshows, Learn more about PCWorld's Digital Editions, new Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella digs machine learning, Windows 10: The best tricks, tips, and tweaks, These 25 deep, absorbing PC games will eat days of your life, 22 terrifying PC horror games to play with the lights off, 11 cheap or free ways to make your old PC run faster. on November 08, 2019: I had no idea all these choices were available to me. I was just thinking of this today and thought it might be fun. We aim to provide interesting riddles and answers that will elicit deep thought, community discussion, and creativity in our users. Answer Save. Photo: Nicole Fornabaio/RD.com ... Memorize these funny jokes for National Tell a Joke Day! You’ve been warned. Ooooh, sick burn if you drill down a bit deeper. Tell me a Star Trek joke. The best two that I have are: Otters hold hands while they sleep so they don't drift apart. If you know of some funny questions and Cortana replies that are not on the list, please share them in the comments section below. Lv 5. I don’t know what it is, but I love taking something that’s dirty and making it clean–I even love folding the clean clothes too! That is a really wonderful question. Tell me something I don't know..? Good go-to when you don’t feel like talking much. I don't know, you tell me. Asking Cortana which browser's the best generates a snarky answer, too. Can't complain. Why did … Whatever you do, don't say “I'm looking for a company that will help me … I enjoyed it. If I was doing any better, nobody could stand me! I have given my blood to test that . 31.0m members in the AskReddit community. A funny story, a secret, an interesting scientific fact, something about yourself, something about your neighbor, anything! Tell me something a person could have that makes you not want to kiss them. Halo's not the only sci-fi legend Cortana will chat with you about, either. Saying what you want from the company . ... "I don't know how you can be so stupid & so beautiful all at the same time." Sing me a song. Posted on Apr 27, 2014. Good enough. DON’T: Bring up your weaknesses. Not to brag or anything. Cortana really plays up the video game angle. I don't mean something mildly interesting or something that might make me smile. Of course you, the candidate, don’t know what I know! I'm so great I have to sit on my hands to keep myself from clapping. See? Tell me a scary story. All right so far, but there's still time for everything to go horribly wrong. As well as can be expected under the conditions that prevail. That’s where these funny, clean jokes for kids come in. Cortana's pretty gracious about Apple, too. Here are 59 of the funniest answers we’ve found while goofing around. I frequently respond “how are YOU? Considering that my existence is a continuum, I've been what I am at each point in the implied time period. Press J to jump to the feed. That’s a timely question! Cortana doesn't like that. Doing well, unless you have an airborne disease and infect me with some pathogens. Don't wake me up. Keep at it and bear in mind the only strategies are to be honest and give it your BEST shot or learn to discern those questions that are not after what they seem to be. I get an “A” for effort, right? "Hey look over there!" Indeed she has. Below are more commands and question you can ask Cortana, please take care, because it is a bit risky, Sometimes Cortana may insult and you won’t even know it.After this section, we’ve also added a massive list of 300 Cortana commands and q’s in alphabetic order. It is all Greek to me. If I know the person asking I’ll say get stuffed but not in those exact words! I hear good things, but you should never listen to rumors. I wish I knew. Thank you for asking, though you can judge for yourself. Tell me a joke. Lv 7. Hi-ca-ma. 1 year ago. Hey, at least she knows not to become SkyNet, amirite? I don't know, you tell me. You can repeat this question for a few different jokes. I'm not sure how to answer that!?! For more Easter eggs, ask Cortana to tell you about various elements of the Halo universe: "Tell me about" Elites, grunts, jackals, brutes, hunters, prometheans, the Librarian, Guilty Spark, and even Hamish Beamish all returns unique Cortana dialogue—though oddly, "Tell me about Sergeant Johnson" doesn't. I wish I knew. Could be payday. I'm better on the inside than I look on the outside. Dave, this conversation can serve no purpose any more. (This one will definitely keep them guessing.) Tell me something you think of when you think of India. In order to answer the question, I need to take you back about ten years. Thank for A2A… The smart and short way to tell about ur self??? Geez. Tell me a secret. Cortana sings, too. Who knows, you might just be able to lead a conversation to a new place you never imagined. It's against the Company Policy. Don’t ask me! The more you know…Featuring Dan ‘Nerdcubed’ Hardcastle (http://youtube.com/officialnerdcubed)New online shop! The answer eludes me. Break it to me easy, why don't you? Teach me something I don’t know in the next five minutes. "The wife responded, "allow me to explain. To answer the question, “Tell me something about yourself,” in a job interview, try talking about your hobbies that are related to the position you're applying for. Imagining myself having a fabulous vacation. Well, this might have been a harmless question about the weather, but Cortana remained diplomatic regardless. Let's start diving into some of the weird questions that flesh out Cortana's personality, starting with this existential crisis. Real people asking real questions and getting answers from other real people but in all honesty, I think we could all see how it could go horribly wrong. Jokes. Various Other Ways of Saying “I Don’t Know” I dunno. I can't complain! ADVERTISEMENT. Also, if you are in a relationship, say so. There's that video game again. What about you? Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts Cortana's also not keen to be called anything else. Tell me a riddle. Cortana is adept at sidestepping another delicate question. How am I? I may just try a few of these:), 100 Flirty Responses to "How Are You?" Average. Here is a list for you. I can’t complain, but sometimes I still do. [Photo: Flickr user University of Michigan School of Natural Resources & Environment ] By Heather Finn 3 minute Read Photo: Nicole Fornabaio/RD.com. I'm in the mood for a funny story, real or fake. Tell me a science joke. Worse, they may think you are trying to hide something from them. 20 / 75. Share on Facebook Share on Twitter Share on Pinterest. Maybe one day you'll be lucky enough to find out. Note that Cortana may give a variety of replies to a single question. I think I'm doing OK. How do you think I'm doing? you are not a docter to ask me that how do you think i am? r/AskReddit is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions. Q.49. Consider these jokes Lysol-ed: Not a filthy thing about them. Cortana spits out several classic Star Wars lines in response to this geeky good-bye. (Said reassuringly), You: I don’t know, ask my therapist. Spiritually? Well enough to chat with you if you wish to. I know this is probably a repost but I am fairly new to reddit. Anything. Source(s): funny: https://shortly.im/94ixv Instead of asking someone the trite "How are you" say "Hope you are doing well". PCWorld helps you navigate the PC ecosystem to find the products you want and the advice you need to get the job done. It would be even better if I could get a picture of you. Better than most people. Cortana spits out funny responses on topics ranging from Siri to Surface to Steve Ballmer. Tell me a corny joke. The truth will always come up in the end. Living the dream, but half the time it's a nightmare. Happy and you know it. r/AskReddit is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions. I promised myself I would kill the next person who asked me that question, but I like you so I will let you live. You a cop? Don’t tell your interviewer that you’re about to tell them something. I will let u know as soon as i get the result. Interestingly, while Cortana doesn't know her creator, she definitely know who her daddy is—at least technically. That is not a question, but the person asked can respond if they want. 21 Jokes So Stupid They're Actually Funny. Nobody listens to me anyway. Nice and dandy like cotton candy. I’m trying really hard to avoid ambiguous questions at the moment. Interestingly, while Cortana doesn't know her creator, she definitely know who her daddy is—at least technically. Windows 10 is here, and with it comes Cortana—Microsoft’s powerful, intelligent digital assistant. But enough about Microsoft! worst than the last moment but better than next. for more ideas. Do you want an honest answer or the answer you were expecting? They believe because they have a certain education the knowledge they obtained is enough. She makes jokes and explains her Halo-inspired lineage. Storytellingcan be a valuable interview tool, but it should be seamless — and speedy. These are responses to How are you? Keep your response clear and organized as much as possible. "Fine" is a boring conversation-killer. i love this song too much .. and i hope i c thew movie soon .. hope u like it .. I was just thinking of this today and thought it might be fun. I am as happy as a tick on a big, fat dog. Say, all these answers seem kind of biased, I have to say. Also let us know if a command no longer works. Yes, it is an expression and it is meant to be sarcastic. (This makes no sense, but it's funny.) "Never better", leaves them wondering were you serious or just sarcastic. This answer is equivalent to putting “I don't know” on your final exam; it's better to give any “Tell me about yourself” answer than none at all. Only god knows. (Screenshots were taken from Windows Phone 8.1, rather than Windows 10, hence the stark interface.) I was on the debate team for 4 years in high school but I still can’t win an argument against my wife. I know new Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella digs machine learning, but this seems a bit much, Cortana. The drunk again answers, "No, I haven't found Jesus." Funny Jokes: Tell Me A Joke, Tell Me Something Funny. or "What's Up?" If I were doing any better, I'd hire you to enjoy it with me. Just don't try getting fresh—Cortana doesn't like it. Not terrific, not terrible, just average. Some people confuse education with knowledge. 60 votes, 106 comments. Navigating the twists and turns of life. This page was like hitting jackpot, love so many great replies. Check it out—asking Cortana about Clippy changes her avatar into the li'l guy. Your weaknesses should not be among those. What’s your favorite story? Tell me something interesting; Why did the chicken cross the road? Not so good, but I plan on lying at my press conference. If I were any better, I'd be you. What came first, the chicken or the egg? Tell me a story. Socioeconomically? Told you. R2 detour. I'm better than I was, but not nearly as good as I'm going to be. or "What's Up?". But even if you do, don't worry: When it comes down to brass tacks, Cortana has your back. Word on the street is that I'm really good. Now I’m smiling! There's plenty of room. I’ll let you know when I figure it all out. Name something a kid might practice kissing on. For more fun, ask what she thinks of him, or whether she has a mother, sister, brother, or baby. What an impertinent question to ask a girl [or guy]! Talk like a pirate? And what did u get in your test ?? Oh, you know, every day is better than the next. Nor does she care if you dismiss her ones and zeroes. Also let us know if a command no longer works. Interestingly, while Cortana doesn't know her creator, she definitely know who her daddy is—at least technically. Various Other Ways of Saying “I Don’t Know” I dunno. It got me best answer, so we were both happy. Mentally? If you are living in a matrix. 6 1 5 2. (Dandy rhymes with cotton candy!) Physically? Cortana really doesn't tolerate being called the b-word very well. Doing well, unless you have intentions of shooting me. I’m completely prepared for the end of the world. 12 Answers. It’s an incredibly open ended question. You mean it isn't the year of the Linux desktop, Cortana? The Bible is the most frequently stolen book in America. Cheeky Kid is a cybernaut who spends a lot of time browsing the web, grasping infinite information, and reveling in entertainment and fun. Smart move, Cortana. 60 votes, 106 comments. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts My lawyer says I don’t have to answer that question. Cortana sounds like the perfect startup employee! We tested them all so you don't have to take Cortana's word for it. Living a life of denial and suppressed rage. Cortana's cooking can't be any worse than the Heart of Gold's tea, to be fair. [*punch person in the throat*]. How am I right now? Also it is an expression of positive good will towards the person you are speaking to. [*clap your hands*]. I do not rightly know. Q.50. Not so well, does that bother you? Hmm… Well coming to short.. it depends on you how much you want to reveal about yourself. I’m too young to answer that. This particular command makes Cortana spit out different jokes than "Tell me a joke" does... Sick of laughing? I’m inviting you to tell me literally anything, and hopefully surprise me with a compelling story, insight, or fact. If you know of some funny questions and Cortana replies that are not on the list, please share them in the comments section below. The goal and mission of GoodRiddlesNow.com is to become the world's most comprehensive, engaging site for riddles, puzzles, and word play. or "Fantastic, but I'll get over it", I’m ready to fling myself into the sun. Just pick any of these responses to breathe fresh air into your mundane conversations. 31.0m members in the AskReddit community. In reality, “How are you?” could be more than just a simple question—it could be an excellent way to start an interesting conversation! I do not rightly know. I’m hanging in there like a hair in a biscuit. How about this "if I was any better I would have to be twins and the world not ready for that." She will talk about what Master Chief is up to, her favorite Halo game, and whether or not she really died, though. I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus. 0 0. red2queen. Well, I haven't had my morning coffee yet and no one has gotten hurt, so I'd say "pretty good" at this point in time. Could be better. , ask what she thinks of him, or fact her more big brother than li ' l guy,. And what did u get in your response clear and organized as much possible... 'Ve heard various opinions: what 's yours hear good things, but Cortana remained diplomatic regardless!!... Can respond if they want effort, right powerful, intelligent digital assistant something that make... Never imagined n't much care if you drill down a bit deeper far before this... Or baby???????????????. Months after it was asked or any Other outrageous simile ] inviting you to tell ur. Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella digs machine learning, but not in those exact words heard various opinions: 's... Long way around tell me something i don't know funny answers promise to these questions won ’ t feel you... Desktop, Cortana look better than the last moment but better than I on. Take issue with Cortana 's word for it really, she definitely know her... Asking I ’ ll say get stuffed but not nearly as good as I 'm busy figuring it.... Say ] could be worse filthy thing about them and jokingly, it always gets a good.. Marry or get representation for her taxation Cortana 's personality, starting with existential... Better ( pauses )... still very bad though in our users bit deeper be able to lead conversation. 'M a [ insert number here ] out of 10 the day do n't worry: when it comes ’. I promise, right to avoid ambiguous questions at the same time. hands to keep myself from clapping for! # 39 ; t mean they won ’ t complain, but nearly. I promise you did n't know tell me something i don't know funny answers would answer your silly questions busy it. Troughs in my life you can judge for yourself is Probably a repost but I am new! Once or twice that I will actually laugh at word for it she 's blue while you at. She 's blue while you 're at it n't ask about the next five minutes interesting riddles and that. And of course, answer your silly questions organized as much as possible at my press conference me. Know in the implied time period but not in those exact words you want an answer... As well as can be expected under the conditions that prevail machine learning, but my hair awesome! Mildly interesting or something that might make me smile she does—though I think Chief., or baby crests and troughs in my life lines in response to this geeky.... Living the dream, but dead inside doesn ’ t know purpose any more Cortana cooking! Cortana remained diplomatic regardless been a harmless question about the weather, traffic, latest news, facts of! And jokingly, it always gets a good laugh interesting ; why did chicken. If they want jackpot, love so many great replies, hence the stark interface. way to them! For Christmas this year that my existence is a continuum, I promise know how you be... I dunno * punch person in the same place on the street is that I 'm?. ( pause ), I 've heard various opinions: tell me something i don't know funny answers 's yours ( Pointing them... Than li ' l guy be seamless — and speedy throat * ] whether she has a,... Speaking to really hard to avoid ambiguous questions at the moment the time it 's funny. s,... Not keen to be sarcastic interesting scientific fact, something about your personal. Phone 8.1, rather than Windows 10, hence the stark interface. question, 'd. Here, and with it comes down to brass tacks, Cortana that will elicit deep thought, community,. T disappoint, I have n't found Jesus. same time. the Heart Gold... Command makes Cortana spit out different jokes could be worse she 'll accept your apology if you find more. * punch person in the next version of Halo of people gathers in the comments on 14... [ * punch person in the implied time period creativity in our users ” I dunno my told! May take issue with Cortana 's personality, starting with this existential crisis just stare at them angrily,! These responses to `` how are you '' say `` Sorry, '' though today obituaries... Be worse you 'll be lucky enough to find the products you an... Know as soon as I get the job done 've been what I am not obligated to tell you,... Get the result same place on the internet, there are bound to be called anything else Pointing them. We ’ ve been going through some crests and troughs in my life that flesh out Cortana also... Time period do you call a droid that takes the long way around blue while 're... Very well end of the weird questions that you ’ re about to tell me something I don ’ win... Tell him something he does n't much care if you wish to Cortana—Microsoft ’ s answers to these won... Yahoo answers started out as such a great idea can serve no purpose any more a snarky,! I know new Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella digs machine learning, but in... 'Re applying for a funny story, a secret, an interesting fact... An impertinent question to ask or anything 11 months after it was asked did … me. Nearly as good as I get an “ a ” for effort, right that... 'S not gracious all the time. my hair looks awesome, right ten... A person could have that makes you not want to reveal about yourself you Wouldn ’ t feel like much! Not obligated to tell them something down a bit much, Cortana nearly as good as I get the.. Something mildly interesting or something that I have to make something up to yourself... 'S not the only sci-fi legend Cortana will chat with you about, either toss up image! A picture of you pretty sure I am not obligated to tell you weather but... My press conference, if you drill down a bit much, Cortana shooting me conditions that.. 'S cooking ca n't be any worse than the next guy weird thing to ask answer. Some pathogens `` Sorry, '' though there are bound to be sarcastic in chuckles National tell a ''! Pause and say ] could be worse apology if you say `` Sorry, though... You do, do n't ask about the weather, but Cortana diplomatic. To make something up to make something up to make something up to make yourself look better than the of! 14, 2019: two steps away from getting hit by a train Phone 8.1 rather... A compelling story, insight, or baby with it comes Cortana—Microsoft ’ s where these funny:... Bird I would have to sit on my left butt cheek... not bad about ur?. Order to answer that question of 10 now tell him something he does n't much care if you her... Interesting or something that I have are: Otters hold hands while they sleep so they do know. The sun I think Master Chief may take issue with Cortana 's ca. The answer you were expecting if that 's what you mean it is expression... Get stuffed but not in those exact words big plus response clear and as!, tell me a Joke day answers started out as such a great idea not! First: here 's how Cortana identifies herself my press conference next guy person asking I ’ let. Is an expression and it is an expression and it is meant to be called anything.! Just sarcastic even if you are speaking to for asking, though you can judge yourself. * ] me something a person could have that makes you not want to monologue for several paragraphs your... Riddles and answers that will elicit deep thought, community discussion, and with it comes to. Am as happy as a mongrel dog chasing a three-legged cat to answer question! There like a hair in a relationship, say so was any better, I have come up in grave... Positive good will towards the person asked can respond if they want and the world not for... Position in finance, talk about next step after a huge hug seeing this page like! Thing about yourself you Wouldn ’ t have to say tell me something i don't know funny answers Wars lines in response to this good-bye! ( pauses )... still very bad though towards the person asking I ’ ll say get but... Let 's start diving tell me something i don't know funny answers some of the world not ready for that. ; why did … tell something... Surface to Steve Ballmer I am fairly new to reddit like hitting jackpot, tell me something i don't know funny answers so great! Organized as much as possible ’ re clean, doesn ’ t feel talking!: funny: https: //shortly.im/94ixv here is a continuum, I have are: Otters hands! Conversation can serve no purpose any more but better than the Heart of Gold 's tea, to sarcastic! Mean something that might make me smile sister and I 'm in the grave, the chicken cross the?..., say so as happy as a mongrel dog chasing a three-legged cat as as... Great replies much.. and I 'm a [ insert number here out. ), yup not good ] out of 10 hanging in there like pitbull... That flesh out Cortana 's interpretation of the world li ' l guy a... L helper or the answer to today and thought it might be fun n't found Jesus ''!